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View from the lawn chair: Intramural Power Rankings and Predictions

As we close in on the midway point of another semester there a quite a few hot topics that students are talking about around the campus. Parking, our football team, free scantrons, Amendment 26 and when the exact date that it will become fashionable again to wear leggings, XXXXL sweatshirts and rain boots. I'm thinking mid-October.

That said, I am going to take a different route, and talk about an issue that has been untouched as of yet by the campus water-cooler. Intramurals. I'm sticking to the important issues see?

Intramurals is the time and place where every underrated in their own mind athlete can shine under the dimming, worn-out lights at Blackburn-McMurrary outdoor sports complex. 

I have the had the pleasure of seeing intramurals from every view: As a player, a fan (i'm just kidding i've got better things to do), a ref and as a Sports Assistant.

I've hurled many an insult at the underpaid zebras, when in fact I didn't even know what I was yelling at them for.

I've made many a questionable call, but stood firm with every decision I've made wearing the black and white (and yellow and blue) stripes. Well, as much confidence as a 20-year old can have after one night of training that involved a youtube video and a lot of stereotypical jokes.

And I've been the asshole in the infamous blue shirt (never did get the right size) who has had to tell at least 75% of you that no, you cannot play just this once without your student ID. Nope, not even if you know your student ID number. Thanks for rolling your eyes and telling me how stupid that rule is.

So with my knowledge of the inner-workings of the student (emphasis on student here) athletes mind (there really isn't much to it), the referee ( what time do I get off. Crap it's cold out here) and the administrator (not really I just got a fancy, yet cheap blue shirt) I feel the need to comment on the major intramural sporting events throughout the next academic year.

I'll open with some power rankings, because I know that is what EVERYONE is worried about.

Greek and Independent Men

This is by far the most entertaining of the three leagues. They play as their own division and the winners face off in the "I care way too much about a T-Shirt Bowl." Last year's attendance was, yet again, just the two teams that showed up (give or take a few girlfriends).

This division is filled with all the high school athletes who were superstars in a certain sport and who had that one team that was really (not at all) interested in giving them a scholarship to come play for them. That (ultimately insignificant) career-ending injury ended their opportunities to grab the spotlight, swoon the cheerleaders and end up on a wheaties box. Excuse me while I roll my eyes.

Here are my initial power rankings for Flag-Football.

Independent

Team Jordan Hite has a simple name, but they are destroying people on the fields having scored 82 points, and allowed 0, through two games. They take on my #2 team the West Canaan Coyotes on Thursday.

  1. Team Jordan Hite
  2. West Canaan Coyotes
  3. Da White Bears
  4. Awesome/We Rule
  5. 10 Lawyers 1 Accountant
  6. Too much speed
  7. Team Break the Silence
  8. Swamp People
  9. Mississippi Meridian
  10. Teammates Matter
  11. Head Nasty INC
  12. Wild Rebel
  13. The Committee
  14. Sum Serious
  15. Landsharkz
  16. Tap that Pass II
  17. Wat was it
  18. Those guys
  19. RC Cola
  20. Gnomes
  21. Nutricious and Delicious
  22. Rebels for Christ
  23. Dirty Birds
  24. Mike Vick in a box
  25. Prime Time
  26. 5th floor braves
  27. Braggadocious
  28. The Sayians
  29. Vertically Challenged
  30. M.S.
  31. YAK
  32. Brown Town Knights
  33. Burt the boats
  34. The Flood
  35. Team Josh Clark
  36. Slamdog Billionaires
  37. BSU Lions
  38. Scissors Den
  39. Show Us Your TDs
  40. The Incredibles

INDEPENDENT GAME OF THE WEEK

Thursday: West Canaan Coyotes vs. Team Jordan Hite

The Lawnchairs prediction: Team Jordan Hite by 2

Greek

The first power rankings for the Greek Division open up with Phi Delta Theta 1 on top after they opened their season with a 40-0 win over some unfortunate team (I reseached this really well). Honestly I'm more shocked by there being two teams from the same fraternity in the top five! Who knew you could get that many frat daddies focused on the same thing for two weeks straight. I'm impressed!

  1. PDT 1
  2. KA 2
  3. ATO 1
  4. Sig Ep
  5. KA
  6. Kappa Sig
  7. Delta Psi
  8. Pike A
  9. ATO 2
  10. Sigma Nu (Jrs)
  11. SAE
  12. Sigma Chi
  13. Beta Upsilon Chi
  14. Beta
  15. Sigma Pi
  16. Phi Psi 2
  17. Phi Delt

GREEK GAME OF THE WEEK

Tonight: KA 2 vs. Sig Ep

The Lawnchairs prediction: KA 2 by 12

Co-Rec

Ah, the simple yet satisfying Co-Rec league. The only league where teams play the game like it should be, (pay attention men's league) for fun. I recommend it. Yes, occassionally one of those overachievers will come around and try to make the game more than just a game, but they are usually told to shut up by several members of their own team.

Mostly I just like this league because as a worker I knew that every time I had one of these games it was easy money.

But I digress.

  1. Sorry Bout It
  2. Team America
  3. Wreckin Cru
  4. TC Squad
  5. Mike Vick in a box
  6. RC Cola
  7. Channel 4 News
  8. ATP
  9. Ole Miss Res Life!
  10. UM Law
  11. Swamp People
  12. Brick Squad
  13. Doc Beastons Henchman
  14. BSU Lions
  15. LRC
  16. Professors

GAME OF THE WEEK

Thursday: Team America vs. Sorry Bout It

The Lawnchairs prediction: Sorry Bout It by 10

Women

I had a whole list full of snarky comments to make about a women's athletics but my boss is making me keep this clean.

Yay women.

  1. Pi Phi
  2. Phi Mu
  3. Chi Omega
  4. Kappa
  5. DG
  6. Theta
  7. AoPi
  8. Tri Delt

GAME OF THE WEEK

Tonight: Kappa vs. Pi Phi

The Lawn Chairs prediction: Pi Phi by 9